


If Harry met Jela

by Enleve



Category: Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality, Liaden Universe - Sharon Lee & Steve Miller
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-20
Updated: 2013-06-20
Packaged: 2017-12-15 14:04:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 664
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/850406
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Enleve/pseuds/Enleve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry Potter-Evans-Verres notices Jela carrying a tree through Hogwarts.  Could it have something to do with the mysterious Professor Quirnius Quirrell?</p>
            </blockquote>





	If Harry met Jela

A short dark-skinned man walked slowly through the corridors of Hogwarts, carrying a tree in a large pot, followed by a magical trunk.

Only the muggleborns seemed at all startled by the man's claim to be a professor's servant, and most shrugged and went back to conversing with their friends.

Harry decided to follow him.

***

Jela walked into Quirrell's office without even knocking. Harry, hidden in his Cloak of Invisibility, slipped in behind him.

Quirrell was slumped in his chair, drooling. Jela reached over to him, and Harry felt a rising sense of urgency. Was he going to hurt Quirrell? Harry slipped off the Cloak of Invisibility and leaned against Quirrell's desk.

Just as Harry was opening his mouth to speak, Jela glanced over, not looking surprised, and said one of the few things that would have reassurred Harry in this situation. "You may have noticed Professor Quirrell's mysterious illness. I am here to save him."

***

Harry helped Jela carry Professor Quirrell's unconscious body into Jela's trunk. Jela tugged at Quirrell's cloak. Harry thought about averting his eyes, but decided he needed to observe what has happening closely. Jela carefully stripped off Quirrell's clothing, and lowered her into the autodoc, murmurring reassurances and a word that sounded like "Cantra."

Lowered _her_ in?

Harry had often wondered about Quirrell's identity, but the possibility that he was a woman, or a trans man, had not occurred to him.

Jela stepped back and the autodoc slowly closed, sealing Quirrell inside. Jela pressed a few buttons on the autodoc's control panel, then read the display with a look of concentration.

Harry leaned over his shoulder, but didn't recognize the alphabet.

"What's wrong?" Harry asked

"She was badly injured from a duel, and becoming Quirrell has removed much of her own first aid and medical knowledge. It is a hazard of being _aelantaza_ on a mission. Also," he paused a moment before continuing, "she is pregnant."

Pregnant? Quirrell? The Quibbler's headline about Malfoy's pregnancy came to his mind, and he felt slightly dizzy. Could more of his supposedly male friends be secretly pregnant? It suddenly seemed a more likely possibility. Updating Bayesian priors, he told himself, finding comfort in labelling the process.

***

"I'd like to introduce you to the tree," Jela said.

"Introduce me?" Harry reached for a large branch and shook it like he would a hand.

An image filled his mind, of dragons flying in a forest of trees like this one, under a pattern of stars that did not match the constellations of Earth. 

Harry let go of the tree, arms trembling. He concentrated on slowing his breathing.

...

...

...

...

...

Trees are sentient?!...And telepathic?...And astronauts?

Harry hadn't realized he had shouted until Jela looked up, appraisingly.

"Only this tree, and its offspring," Jela said. 

The branches shook, although Harry had not noticed a draft. A seed pod fell onto his forearm, rolled along it, and he caught it reflexively.

"The tree happens to be a biochemist. The effects can be striking, or subtle, but are usually beneficial. It has been keeping me alive these past weeks. Though a warning -- if you eat that, I would recommend using an extra barrier form of birth control."

Although Harry was only eleven, he stored that tidbit away for the future. It wasn't as if he was planning to have sex without condoms to begin with anyway. He lifted the pod to his nose. It smelled wonderful, and he had missed breakfast to follow Jela. Extra longevity sounded good too. The pod opened to his touch, and he took a bite. It tasted like the most wonderful thing he'd ever eaten. Although he was hungry, he decided to put the rest in his pocket, for later experimentation and testing.

***

After that, they got to talking.

It was not often that someone else's plans made Harry's own plans for himself seem unambitious.

"You're planning to _create a universe_ using the power of _math_?"

"And a faster-than-light space ship," Jela said helpfully.


End file.
